Beefing Up..........

Troy and Putri reviewing Mama Mi's situation :

Troy: "Psst.....Putri,....I heard that Mama Mi lost her appetite......she's actually not eating..!"

Putri: "How about that? It's probably just temporary....I can't imagine her going off food...ever.."

Troy: "Well, you'd better believe it! Her tastebuds' gone haywire....she's gone off FISH...FISH!!"

Putri: "Really....? Well, well, well....this is good news for us. She'd better start liking beef then!"

Troy: "Yeah...more fish for us..........anytime, Mama!"

The End.

May 8 (Day 6 of Cycle 2)

Syukur Alhamdullillah things are looking up. Maybe I was bored being bored?

I was bored at feeling restless and feeling claustrophobic. It was a bit too warm to venture out, besides my energy level was still below average. I passed the mirrors and quite a few times my reflex action was being shocked at the image in the mirror which appeared to be that of a stranger!

The improvement that I welcomed was that at least I was able to read something today and not feel as though my eyes were going to pop out of my head. I decided to boil some red dates so that I could drink up the stew later. I started on a book called "The Breast Cancer Survivor's Fitness Plan" and read about how a properly planned exercise program following completion of adjuvant treatments can contribute towards the physical and emotional wellbeing of cancer survivors. Otherwise, the fatigue that accompanies chemo and radiation therapy might be prolonged up to months or years ! I am indeed glad to learn this because otherwise it will be so easy to continue and entertain the lethargy. There has to be a cut-off point somewhere when the mind really need to take over the body just to ensure both mind and body can co-exist healthily.

Tired as I was, I decided that perhaps I need to boost up my energy level by taking some red meat so that the iron will help boost up my haemoglobin level. I remember my late Mum would buy chunks of fresh beef and "tulang" still red with the marrow, and slow boil them for the goodness it will bring. She would add smashed garlic, ginger and some spices to finetune the flavour and when done, sprinkle the rich stew with fried shallots and chopped chinese parsley and spring onions. She would do this for us, for herself and for anyone else who might be feeling unwell. I would later do similar for her in her old age . And it was always so gratifying to see how well it served her.

I spent quite sometime during the day pondering over what it is like if my Mum is around when I am sickly like this. I am very certain that even if she wasn't well and too tired to do it herself, she would see to it that I will be provided with whatever she deemed as nutritious for me. Having raised 6 kids into healthy adults ( until they decide to take their nutrition into their own hands, that is), she would just know what to do. How I miss her, especially at times like this. One is never too old for one's mother. With Mother's Day coming around the corner, I hope I will not be feeling too sad.

Inspired by what I think Emak will do, I waited for Kakak to return and garnered up all my energy to go to the Supercity S'mart nearby. My friend did call to say she could buy the beef and bring it over to the house for Kakak to cook but I thought perhaps I needed to get out and about. I was hoping to find some beef bones but they only had oxtail but that was packed with a hefty coating of fat! A definite no-no. We managed to get some finely sliced beef specially for stir-fries and also some tougher, red cuts which would be perfect for braising tomorrow into a soup or stew.

It was rather strange to feel tired just going on a little shopping trip to grab a few items! We bought enough to cook up a nice colourful Chinese style stir-fried beef with beans, colourful peppers, broccoli, carrots, ginger and had that with steaming hot rice. The beef was finely stripped so it was really tender to the bite and I did not have to use up too much energy to enjoy my dinner. I was too tired earlier on that I just had fruits (lots of fruits) for lunch so I made sure that I finished up what was on my dinner plate. My friend, who arrived at my place before we got back from the Supermart, joined us for dinner. It was a very nice dinner tonight, very different from how I felt about the last dinner barely 24 hrs before.

That's exactly what it will be like throughout this treatment experience, I think. You can feel like a dishcloth one minute and before you know it, your mood will fly and you feel fine. I just need to remember that every time I feel down. And that everyone goes through this at some point in time during their treatment. I just need to have faith that it will pass and that once treatment is completed, it will be different and Insya Allah, better.

The beef really helped, even if it hadn't been digested and absorbed by my system yet it had a positive effect on my mood. I wonder if its the goodness in the beef, or the act of going out to get something for myself that helped to boost my spirit and mood? I am pretty certain though that it has a lot to do with me feeling re-assured that this would be exactly what my Emak would have done if she had been around for me........may Allah rest her soul in peace.

Insya Allah, I should have enough energy to meet with the officer in Syabas tomorrow or day after so that he can help me resolve the on-going saga of overbilling on my water bill. Now, that will really jolt me back to reality. I need to get all my energy back in the short term so that at least I can settle this long outstanding matter!