Feeling Good and Blog Hopping

Ashley says: "Mama Mi....are you sure you want to go through with this....what do you call it...a "Garage Sale"? Whatever you do, please do not sell our 3 storey condo-cage, okay? Even if the person offers you buckets of money, please keep the cage okay. We plan to join you in KL soon, the moment your maid arrives. So remember, sell everything it you have to, but not our cage, faham...!"

It has been a busy couple of days preparing for the Garage sale and I had not updated this blog since day 16 and will now update it for Day 16 (May 18), Day 17 (May 19) and today Day 18 (May 20). It is difficult to journalise when the memory has to recall details of feelings and emotions more than 24 hours "old". I may also need to flip-flop between my blogs. During "normal " feel-good moments, the tendency is to want to write less about the impact of treatment as there is not much to write for the records.

I feel "normal" so the brain forgets about chemo, WMDs, and only get reminded when I am infront of the mirror cleaning my teeth and getting ready to go out and trying to decide what head gear to put on. I have yet to take to a wig as I think it will make my head boil and my brains fried. I do have a wig but the person I see in the mirror is not me. I cannot somehow trick my mind to believe that the lady with the lush tresses is actually nearly-bald me. So for the time being no wigs as I think I still can look presentable in a bandanna or cap, and when the time is right I will put to good use my collection of scarves.

I am now thinking that if I have no "treatment-related" entries to make I will hop over to my other blogs (http://lifematters2me.blogspot.com or http://aclosetfulofcerita.blogspot.com or http://mysecretrecipes.blogspot.com ). This is because I would like this particular blog to retain the flavour of a journal by a BC patient undergoing treatment. I do not want to consciously dilute it with my other thoughts and ruminations that are not really cancer or treatment related.

This blog will continue to record my daily experience relating to my treatments. Should it be a normal day when not much treatment related issues are worthwhile recording, then I will continue to post on other issues, if significant enough to me, in my other blogsites. I need to keep the momentum going so that I will not miss jotting down things which are important and significant lest they be forgotten.

May 18 (Day 16 of Cycle 2)

I continued to feel good and rather energised by the prospect of unloading some of the clutter in the backroom. I spent quite a bit of time mentally sorting out what needs to be done before I actually got into the act of physically peering into some of the plastic boxes and containers that housed all kinds of things hoarded over the years. Just to save some time, I decided that I will put all the containers and boxes in the backroom out onto the front porch on the day of the Garage Sale. After lunch of savoury pancakes with mushroom topping at Paddington's Pancake with a friend, I collected decorative articles ( figurines, various horse statues, wallplaques, framed prints) and put them all in boxes. Then it was costume jewelleries that I have not used in years, wallets and handbags. Also many, many pieces of silks, linen, cotton materials, velvet, lace buried deep in the recesses of my store cupboards that can be turned into blouses, kurungs, skirts or suits. These were purchased some time back and for some reason forgotten? The activity of sorting through the items took up the whole evening. My friend S dropped by incase I needed any help with sorting out things. It was not easy to have someone help with the sorting as I would still need to make a decision of whether to keep or let go. So I ended up having to do all that alone. Only Kakak helped me to arrange the things I was planning to let go into the various boxes and containers.

I was quite exhausted by the time I retired for the night. But I can't help feeling excited at the thought of who will want all these stuff and was also quite worried that I might oversleep while a crwod of people are waiting for me to open the sale!

May 19(Day 17 of cylce 2 and the day of the Garage Sale)

I set the alarm to 6 am and after Suboh prayers, supervised Kakak on which boxes are to be transferred to the porch and how to arrange them so that prospective bargain hunters will find it easy to move systematically from one box to the next to rummage through the items on display. We were done arranging the items by about 7.45 or so. When Kakak left for work, I got ready and was just about to have my breakfast when the first batch of bargain hunters arrived at 8! The sale was supposed to start at 9 and I wasn't ready. So I thanked them for being early but firmly told them to try the other houses first as I can only be ready at 9.

Thank God my 2 nephews (God bless them) turned up soon after, so I was able to have a proper breakfast as I know I will be needing all the energy afterwards when the crowd turns up. My friend S also turned up to "tumpang" her stuff that she needed to clear from her house, all her designer suits and work shoes and bags that she no longer require following her retirement.

Apparently Jalin Realty had advertised in the Star, so quite a number of people form as far as Rawang, S.Buloh, Puchong, Ceras came by, not just from the neighbourhood. I started out with a bandanna on my head but by 10 am with the midday heat building up, I decided to abandon the bandanna and went "au naturel" for all to see my almost bald head. It felt much more comfortable that way.

The garage sale was a success, not just at my place but I gathered my neighbours did very well as well and were able to clear what they intended to clear. Some of the people did ask if I was undergoing chemo and shared with me some tips they gathered from their friends about managing chemo side-effects. Useful tips about going for Qigong Walks that will help to charge up the body and boost the immune system through proper breathing (similar concept in Yoga).

We were done by about 2 pm although the plan was to end by 12. My nephews were great, they helped with the pricing stickers and attended to the buyers once they were sure how much the things should be. It was fun being on the other side of bargaining. It was also fun to see the incredulous looks on some of the buyers who had asked how much certain items were eg cushion covers, and we would ask how much do you want it to be , and if they say RM3, we would say, take it for RM 2 or RM 1!!! The items which remained uncleared were the clothes ( my "slim" clothes) as most of the buyers were bigger sized compared to moi. So those are now being temporarily stored in the cupboard in the backroom until I can give them away to similarly sized people who may be interested to inherit them.

For all their hardwork, my nephews were amply rewarded! I shared with them whatever we collected, they were 2 happy campers! The agent from Jalin mentioned that this Community Garage Sale will be a monthly affair if there are enough participants. My friends and siblings nearby are now very keen to "tumpang" their stuff at the next sale as they saw how much fun we had. I surprised myself at how much energy I had dealing and managing the crowd and the "bargaining".

Some lessons were learnt though. Organisation is very important and having adequate assistance to help manage the crowd. It is also a very interesting opportunity to observe human nature, where Man is the hunter. Everyone looking for a bargain. I am tempted to scribble down my thoughts on this based on this event today in my other blog (Life Matters) one of these days.

It was so pacifying and gratifying to end the day knowing that some people had came and left with stuff that they had obtained at a real bargain ( RM 10 for a piece of silk enough to make a baju kurung or a L.Ashley dress) or RM 1 for a squash racket!

For someone undergoing chemotherapy for a life threatening disease, this activity today was quite meaningful for me. There is more to the rest of my life than acquiring more wealth or more possessions. It is more meaningful to share and let go and just have enough, nothing more nothing less. Just enough. It is for me now to determine and stick to my definition of what is enough....for me.

May 20 (Day 18 of cycle 2)

Believe it or not, after the Garage Sale yesterday, I was still full of energy to go out for dinner with 2 of my friends all the way to The Curve! And I had thought that I would collapse in a heap by the evening. This morning, I had to wake up early as I had planned with a friend to go to the Lake Gardens to try and locate the early birds who apparently practice an open Qigong group exercise in several locations there. We got the the gardens by 7.30 but couldn't site any Qigong sessions (maybe they had all dispersed by then) so we went on an "Aromatherapy" morning brisk walk instead. It was really refreshing to follow the paths that were lined with Cempaka trees, Jasmine and even Kesidang. I even managed to pluck some lovely bunches of Kesidang, they remind me of my early childhood when as children, we loved to sneak into bilik Pengantins to smell the bunga rampai, which is 80% daun pandan and 20% fragrant flowers, especially the Kesidang. Hmmm.

For the first time since I started my chemo, I had a deep snooze in the afternoon!! I don't usually nap in the afternoon, and when going through the chemo side-effects in the first few days, no matter how fatigued I felt, I just couldn't lull myself to have a nap so that I am unconscious of the side-effects. Today, I fell asleep while reading the Sunday papers! After the lovely walk in the gardens, we went for a really nice breakfast at Marmalade in Mount Kiara, bought the Sunday papers and my friend dropped me off.

After a refreshing shower, I settled on my sofa with a glass of Rosella juice (home made) and started to read the papers. Kakak had gone back to her house for her Sunday get-together with her family members and we had run the washing. Somewhere between reading about the royal wedding and the cartoon pages, I had drifted off into dreamland! I was woken up when my mobile rang when S called to say that the maid had cooked Nasi Beriani Ayam and that they will send some over to my house. That was very thoughtful of them.

It is great to feel normal again. When RJ dropped by to send over some green tea from my brother in Melaka, we had tea while it rained cats and dogs and more, outside. Hot green tea and scones with honey, how could we go wrong? When the rain stopped, S and I went to the Bangsar Pasar Malam to get some fresh fruits and vegetables. I went looking for Pucuk Paku and Kacang Botol so that I can include them in my diet for the upcoming week, in an effort to ensure a good blood count. I am due for cycle 3 on May 24, Insya Allah if my FBC is good.

Sunday is either a round-up day for the previous week or a start-up day for the coming one. Either way for me, this has been a meaningful Sunday. Meaningful because I was able to round up the week and felt good that I was able to do something different and grateful that I was able to make people happy when they got great bargains and went home happy. It is also meaningful because I now have 4 days of feeling good prior to the next chemo, and starting today I must make sure I rest, eat and sleep well so that I am strong enough to withstand the 3rd onslaught of the WMDs. Insya Allah it can be better.